Vol 2 No 7 - February 26, 2007

Acetifying an innocuous idea

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Me nearest and dearest often describe me as being “music intolerant”.

Although I am certainly intolerant of people advocating a flat earth, phrenology, palmistry, astrology, magic and a sweet potato cure for AIDS, I am concerned about this ariose accusal… was it not I, on my way to restructure my student loan, in the early 80’s, who abandoned my pecuniary purpose of the day to see Pink Floyd’s The Wall? And see it again – four times that first day, and again, four times the next?

Music intolerant. Pur-leaze.

O, and I am also, of course, certainly, intolerant of people advocating the God-hypothesis as a legitimate alternative weltanschauung worthy of consideration and respect.

I warm too, to a “nice tune”, and to indicate my ability to rise above mere platitude on the topic of music, I hasten to add that I am able to prize philharmonic prestidigitation.

However… given half a chance I’ll slip Steve Hofmeyr’s Pampoen into the car stereo (I seldom, if ever, simply listen to music without also engaging in some other activity, such as driving) and I have been known to favour – to the absolute horror of my teenage daughters – a show (poorly attended, truth be known) by Lance James[1] at last year’s KKNK, to one my family enjoyed, at exponentially higher cost, by some character named after The Christ and a small lizard.[2]

But when my daughters introduced me to Bok van Blerk’s De la Rey late last year, I was hooked. Right away.

I have little affinity for Elizabeth’s islet and her people. To the best of my knowledge, such as I have, courtesy of a Broederbond high school history teacher with a career curtailed by his abject inability to wield ‘Liza’s lingo, the Kakies slipped glass slivers into the porridge in concentration camps they used to defeat the Boers in what ranks, to this day, as one of the most unfair wars on the regrettable report card of humankind.

But I did not, and I do not, need a rousing song to muster my ill feeling for the British – their regular trouncings on the rugby fields and cricket pitches of the world humours me sufficiently.

No, what grabbed me about De la Rey, was the catchy tune and the metre, the cadence, of “De la Rey De la Rey, sal jy die Boere kom lei, De la Rey De la Rey…”

It could, for all I care, jab at the idiocy of the KKK, or whatever… I like the tune and I love the round sound of “De la Rey De la Rey – lei – De la Rey De la Rey.”

I am inevitably reminded of one of my all-time favourite Monty Python skits – The Cheese Shop:

Customer: … I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick", so, I curtailed my Walpoling activities, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!

Owner: Come again?

Customer: I want to buy some cheese.

Owner: Oh, I thought you were complaining about the bazouki player!

Customer: Oh, heaven forbid: I am one who delights in all manifestations of the Terpsichorean muse!

Owner: Sorry?

Customer: 'Ooo, Ah lahk a nice tuune, 'yer forced too!

Owner: So he can go on playing, can he?

Customer: Most certainly!

I suspected from the outset, and Van Blerk and his cadre confirmed as much, that it is all about a catchy tune – play it backwards even, and no message about the wholesale slaughter of political unpopular fellow nationals can be heard.

Says Sean Else, co-owner of the record company that produces Van Blerk, “It could have been about De Wet or De la Rey. Any of the great generals.”[3]

Adds partner Johan Vorster, “For me it’s about the melody. You can’t make Kemp rhyme. You can’t make Beyers rhyme. Much less some other surnames.”

“De la Rey – lei – De la Rey.”

Kemp, Schkemp; Beyers, Schmeyers – it simply can’t be done.

Asked Carte Blanche anchor Ruda Landman: “But you (Bok van Blerk) would go to a Boeremag[4] audience?”

Van Blerk: “If they pay me, yes. Why not?”

Why not, indeed?

A catchy tune. Money to be made. Publicity money cannot buy… a smiling, nay laughing artist, all the way to the bank.

And for me, personally – Steve Hofmeyr has competition… Pampoen and Die Blou Bul Liedjie[5] may never regain the prime spot on my car stereo: “De la Rey De la Rey, sal jy die Boere kom lei, De la Rey De la Rey…”

So, it’s all right then?

No. I’m afraid not. It’s not all right.

There are various socio-political arguments that acetify this innocuous song into something noxious. It is somewhat impossible to page through an Afrikaans publication at present and not see some opinion on “Bok van Blerk’s De la Rey.”[6]

I do not purport to contribute to this debate. I am almost completely ad idem (almost surely) with leading South African social commentator Max du Preez on De la Rey.

I think – and yes, I do realise that this was a somewhat long introduction to what is a rather concise point – that De la Rey is a compelling analogy on the presence of “God” in society at large.

“God” is a rather harmless idea in the minds of simple people who mostly can be convinced of just about anything: that the earth and the universe is but 6000 years old; that the dead somehow live forever after their initial demise… and so on and so forth.

But this “God” idea, in the minds of some believers, is manifested in war and oppression on an unprecedented scale – this selfsame insipid “God” can, and does, spurn the most horrible deeds.

It would be better to do away with this God hypothesis altogether – the loss of that warm fuzzy feeling of belonging a small price to pay for the eradication of all manner of atrocity perpetrated in the name of “God”. It’s a no-brainer, really. But, of course, it is never that easy, is it now?

“God” can not be undone. But “God” must be kept in check. Or rather, the people who harbour “God” in their minds should be kept in check.

“God” must go.

Although we can hardly hope for a society in which God is rejected (some 53% of Americans have recently indicated that they would not vote for an atheist presidential candidate[7]), we can at least stop behaving as if the God hypothesis is worthy of our collective respect.[8]

Ditto De la Rey.

Enjoy it. Hum it. Be entertained.

But be vigilant. Keep those baloney detectors switched on and calibrated.

De la Rey is a rousing popular Afrikaans song by a hitherto unknown artist that is seen by some to rally White against Black.

Who was Koos de la Rey?

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[1] Rumoured to be the father of Country music in South Africa… certainly the senior Country statesman.

[2] Exceptionally talented South African artist Chris Chameleon.

[3] 18 February 2007. Carte Blanche. (South African Dstv actuality program.) Producer : A2 Productions. Presenter : Ruda Landman. Researcher : Wynand Grobler.

[4] A political right wing motley of aggrieved Whites shaking lilliputian fists at the colossal Black democratically elected African National Congress government.

[5] Songs by South African superstar Steve Hofmeyr, the latter a rousing song in honour of Hofmeyr’s beloved Rugby Franchise, The Blue Bulls of Pretoria.

[6] Even the renowned South African business weekly, Financial Mail, carried comment, by Rapport (the world’s largest Afrikaans weekly) editor Tim du Plessis – De la Rey rides again … looking at the emergence of a new Afrikaner.

[7] Charles Smith. February 25, 2007. Hilary, Obama se sepie. Rapport. 23.

[8] With acknowledgement to A.N. Wilson, Against Religion.